WTF

MUSIC +++ FILM +++ SPORT +++ PHOTO +++ LINK +++ POORLY REASONED POLITICAL OPINION AND STUPID JOKE

LAW
San Francisco just passed a law.
The supervisors -- one of whom, in my eternal wisdom, I work for -- passed an ordinance, three, actually, describing exactly the conditions under which you may or may not keep a dog.

For example, the dog has to have a five-sided home. The pentagon would suffice.

There are provisions for how many inches of water in his bowl, number of spikes in his collar and quelludes in his kibble (for pit bulls, rotweilers, and certain sarcastic, elevator-operating basset hounds;) you get the idea.

Now, you have to understand, San Francisco is a hippie little town, seven miles by seven, with about 120,000 dogs in it. And they sure do love their politics.

So it should come as no real surprise that these bleeding-heart types, which describes, for one, my whole family-and-friend set, provided a single baffling exception to this new law. If you're financially unable to provide the specified minimum of space, shelter, and care for your dog... you're exempt.

Lower-middle class busboy living in the Mission District, cops find four-sided doghouse on your property... you're a VIOLATOR. And remember, California has that groundbreaking three-strikes-for-stealing-three-pizzas law. Millionaire lawyer in Pacific Heights, four-sided doghouse? Strike two.

Bum living on the street, dog got ribs sticking out left, right, and center, in the pouring rain?

Get out of jail free.

Think I'm exaggerating? Making it up?

It's in the papers. It's on the books. Look it up.

You should move to our town. It's just what we need. More fucking tourists.

MR

QWTOFDY
"Perhaps it was right to dissemble your love,
But--why did you kick me down the stairs?"
-John Philip Kemble