What I Learned In Gym Class

MUSIC +++ FILM +++ SPORT +++ PHOTO +++ LINK +++ POORLY REASONED POLITICAL OPINION AND STUPID JOKE

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You know, there's a telling statistic for most any game. Tonight's Phoenix - Golden State game it was this: the Suns went plus-twelve on assists to turnovers, and the Warriors minus-five. You know those two teams, and you look at that, and you can see the whole game in your mind.

The high school football game I covered today for a local second-banana outfit is told more like this: the visitors won the first half 24-0, and lost the second only 23-0.

I love the language -- both the lingo and the numbers -- that springs from these ungeekly endeavors. I still say, if you show me the right guy's numbers, and we're talking baseball here, I can tell you how old he is, where he's from, righty or lefty: basically pick him out of a lineup.

So, for posterity: favorite old-school players, no particular order.

Dwight Gooden
Will Clark
Andres Big Cat Galarraga
Jack Morris
Andre the Hawk Dawson
Eric Davis

...Eric Davis, this dude was incredible. We're talking about a man who stole 50 bases in a season, who scored 120 runs, knocked in 100, went 30-30... but NEVER reached as many as five hundred at-bats. An awesome fielder, and a bat so quick he had to jerk off for two tenths of a second to kill time. Imagine going to an L.A. high school that had to play against him and Darryl Strawberry.

It's late. I'm putting on porn and passing out.

MR

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"I expect that Woman will be the last thing civilized by Man."
-George Meredith